The heel grabber

This week's flashback post introduces us to a man I look forward to talking with someday in heaven - Jacob. His life doesn't exactly start out as a glowing example of faith. In fact, he does a bang-up job of living up to the meaning of his name: the heel-grabber. The deceiver. A name and character that only God could change.

We are going to skip over a bunch of stuff and head straight toward Jacob, our next major player in the book of Genesis. At the end of Genesis 25, Jacob and Esau, fraternal twins, are born to Isaac and Rebecca.

Gen. 25:24-26 "So when her days were fulfilled for her to give birth, indeed there were twins in her womb. And the first came out red. He was like a hairy garment all over; so they called his name Esau. Afterward his brother came out, and his hand took hold of Esau’s heel; so his name was called Jacob."

Image by pwcorgigirl via Flickr

First, I feel that I just must point out the description of Esau. Poor Rebecca! This is NOT what a mother longs to see when she takes her first look at her baby! Yikes! Nathan and I would someday like to have an Irish Setter named Esau - picture his red hairy ears blowing in the wind...

Anyway. You have this weird orangutan child and then comes the second, grabbing his brother's heel. They name him Jacob, meaning "heel grabber," aka: deceiver. He trips people up. Think about that annoying boy in your 6th grade class that would walk behind you and try to kick your heels as you walk. That's what this means. He trips people up and tries to supplant them. And boy, Jacob does his best to live up to his name.

In my opinion, Jacob is another Bible character that people assume is a "good guy" throughout his life, just because we hear his name a lot. As we will study today, this is not the case! Jacob is playing for the "blue team" for much of his life. He will eventually switch sides, but it's a long journey.

Genesis 25:30-34
Now Jacob cooked a stew; and Esau came in from the field, and he was weary. And Esau said to Jacob, “Please feed me with that same red stew, for I am weary.” Therefore his name was called Edom. But Jacob said, “Sell me your birthright as of this day.” And Esau said, “Look, I am about to die; so what is this birthright to me?” Then Jacob said, “Swear to me as of this day.” So he swore to him, and sold his birthright to Jacob. And Jacob gave Esau bread and stew of lentils; then he ate and drank, arose, and went his way. Thus Esau despised his birthright.

This story does not really put either son in a very good light. Let's clarify first what the birthright was. The older son would traditionally be given a double portion of the inheritance. In other words, when Isaac died, Esau would have been given 2/3 of the inheritance, and Jacob 1/3. Jacob's manipulation here is obvious, but Esau's not off the hook, either. This was one impulsive, carnal, stomach-driven guy who clearly was not acting in wisdom or valuing the importance of the birthright. That was a mighty expensive bowl of lentil stew.

[We won't cover it in detail due to time, but check out the events of chapter 26 - Isaac does the exact same thing Abraham does, claiming that his wife is really his sister! Deception is definitely a family trait that Jacob has clearly inherited!]

On to chapter 27. This is the story of Jacob deceiving ("Jacobing") his father to steal the blessing. The blessing is different from the birthright. Again, the birthright is a double portion of the inheritance. The blessing transfers the supernatural blessing of God to the next generation. In 26:12, God's blessing of Isaac is obvious. "Then Isaac sowed in that land, and reaped in the same year a hundredfold; and the Lord blessed him." Reaping 100 times what he sowed! That is unbelievable! It's an obvious supernatural occurrence, and it's due to God's blessing. That is what Jacob really wants.

Now, read through this account and see how many times Jacob deceives ("Jacobs") his father.
•I am Esau your firstborn (19)
•“How is it that you have found it so quickly, my son?” And he said, “Because the Lord your God brought it to me.” (20)
•And he did not recognize him, because his hands were hairy like his brother Esau’s hands; so he blessed him. (23)
•“Are you really my son Esau?” He said, “I am.” (24)
•...he smelled the smell of his clothing, and blessed him... (27)

Over, and over, and over again Jacob purposely deceives his father. He even uses God as part of his lie!

It's not clear what would have happened if Isaac had gone ahead and blessed Esau - after all, God had told Rebecca before they were born that the older would serve the younger. We do know that God did indeed bless Jacob. The rest we have to leave in the "questions we will have to ask God someday" file!

For Rebecca and Jacob, this again boils down to an issue of whether or not they believe the promises of God. He had said that Jacob would be the prominent son. If they truly believed Him, they wouldn't have needed to try to manipulate and steal what they felt was rightfully Jacob's. God's word is powerful, and it will be carried out. Ultimately, although God does bless Jacob and fulfills the prophecy despite the clear manipulation and deception, be clear that God does not condone their lies. The Bible is crystal clear about deceit.

"Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, But those who deal truthfully are His delight." (Prov. 12:22)

Deceit is, in some ways a very subtle sin. Especially when it runs in families (as it has for Jacob), and lying to escape from danger or a difficult situation is second nature. God will change Jacob's heart and character, but it will take time. May we echo the words of David in Psalm 139:23-24 when he says,

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting."

Book review: Already Gone

Ever think a book of statistics could keep you up at night? This one may be it, especially if you're a parent and/or involved in Christian education.

This book is the result of a collaborative project between Ken Ham of Answers in Genesis and Britt Beemer of America's Research Group to survey 1,000 young adults who grew up in solid, Bible-teaching churches but have left the church either permanently or temporarily. Typical thinking in Christian circles is that young adults leave the church in college due to teachings and culture that challenges their Christian beliefs. Ham and Beemer's findings run contrary to this assumption, and they are shocking and disturbing.

"We've always been trying to prepare our kids for college... but it turns out that only 11 percent of those who have left the Church did so during the college years. Almost 90 percent of them were lost in middle school and high school. By the time they got to college they were already gone! About 40 percent are leaving the Church during elementary and middle school years! Most people assumed that elementary and middle school is a fairly neutral environment where children toe the line and follow in the footsteps of their parents' spirituality. Not so. I believe that over half of these kids were lot before we got them into high school! Whatever diseases are fueling the epidemic of losing our young people, they are infecting our students much, much earlier than most assumed." (31)

From their conclusions, 60% of the children and teens sitting in our chairs and pews each Sunday will disappear in the coming years. In fact, Ham argues that they might be physically sitting there week after week, but they are already gone. Want some statistics that will really keep you up at night? There was no statistical difference in their study between kids who attended public schools, Christian schools, or homeschool. No difference between Christian and secular college. Sunday School did make a difference, but not the one you would think - according to their study, kids were more likely to leave the church if they were also attend Sunday School!

I found it fascinating that the majority of the individuals they surveyed seem to have authentic saving faith in Christ. Most even agree that attending church is important for believers. So, where are they?

Ham's primary conclusion: the Church has failed to teach the Bible as relevant fact. We have, intentionally or unintentionally, taught the Scriptures as "stories" that relate to spiritual matters and have avoided engaging the deluge of challenging questions from the secular world that bombard churched children and adults the other 166 hours of their week. Questions about the reliability of the Bible, why homosexuals shouldn't be allowed to marry, the origins of the universe, the age of the earth, the feasibility of a world-wide flood, etc. When kids raise these questions in church, they are often told that it doesn't matter what they believe, as long as they trust Jesus. Or they are told we can't really know for sure. Or they are told just to talk about that at school and talk about Jesus at church. Conclusion: the Bible must not be true when it comes to "real" things like history and biology and geology, it just speaks to our "faith."

Secondly, we have failed to connect the Bible to our everyday life. We have tolerated hypocrisy, we have failed to teach Truth in a challenging and relevant way, we have compromised what the Bible actually teaches about the function and purpose of the church in favor of traditions and entertainment. Even people who sincerely believe in Christ as their Savior and believe that the Bible is true have left the church because it doesn't seem relevant to real life.

Ham is blunt and straightforward in this book without coming across harsh. But, I think he is right - the American Church needs to take a serious look at itself because it is dying from the inside out. If we compromise the foundation of our faith, what do we have left?

The second half of the book deals with what we should do about this epidemic. Personally, I would have loved to see this section get a little more practical, but I think that really is outside the scope and purpose of this book. Although the subtitle is "why your kids will leave church and what you can do to stop it," the "what to do" is so huge that this really needs to be a springboard for much more if anything is really going to change.

Why do I say that? For this to change in any noticeable way, Ham truthfully says that the majority of church members need to personally examine their thinking about the reliability and accuracy of the Bible, including in Genesis 1-11. That alone sounds nearly impossible without the direct intervention of God. Then the church leadership needs to examine and overhaul how we're "doing church" and why, the content of the sermons, the curriculum used in children's, youth, and adult ministries and Bible studies and perhaps even question and/or eliminate extraneous programming that isn't doing the job. We need to believe the Truth before we can defend it. We need to teach the Truth before it can be lived out. It is an enormous task, and it is almost laughable to say that in 73 pages those issues can be addressed well.

This book is something I hope that thousands of parents and members of church leadership will read and "chew on." Ham and Beemer have handed us a grim diagnosis, and we need to prayerfully seek God for answers about what to do about it. In reality, I think they have unmasked some deeper, foundational issues for the Church that have no easy answers - the answers are straightforward (Know the Bible, teach the Bible, live the Bible), but the practical aspects of what that means in our churches have huge implications that need serious thought.

Learning at the hearth of the ultimate wise woman

Image by ...-Wink-... via Flickr

[Watch out! This is a long one!] Yesterday we talked about instilling the importance of diligent work in our kids. I said that in our next post we would discuss how much they learn from their mothers modelling this trait, and to give backbone to this discussion we're going to flip over to Proverbs 31.

Wait, wait! I see your eyes glazing over... stay with me!

Proverbs 31 is probably the most quoted, most referenced, most discussed passage on being a godly wife. I must confess, though, that every time I study this chapter I come away feeling defeated and discouraged - this woman who apparently never sleeps, is completely organized and can spin and sew and cook and organize and run a home-business while managing her home in a way unmatched by the rest of the feminine world (oh, and she helps the poor and plants vineyards in her spare time) is completely and totally intimidating to me.

A few months ago in our class at church, we had split men and women and the guy who was teaching that day gave us a list of verses to look up. He was wanting to encourage us, apparently, by having us read Proverbs 31. We were supposed to read it and feel good about all we do. Unlike what he intended, we read it and felt like big fat failures!

Because of this history of feeling like a loser every time I picked up this chapter, I found it refreshing and liberating to learn that this chapter is more than an impossible to-do list for a woman who wants to honor God and her husband. The fact that this amazing chapter is written in an acrostic form (each verse begins with the next letter of the Hebrew alphabet) is so important to understanding what we are being told here! I will quote from Dr. Seuss and Bible Trivia:

Another form of Hebrew poetry is the acrostic form, where each line of poetry begins with the next letter of the Hebrew alphabet. It carries the idea of totality, ie: "As we have exhausted the alphabet, so we have exhausted the subject."

This section of Proverbs 31 is the last portion of the book of Proverbs, the premier book about living wisely. Written in an acrostic form, this poem is not just giving you a to-do list. This poem is describing a woman who is the quintessential wise woman. As you read through the preceding 30 chapters of Proverbs and glean all kinds of nuggets of wisdom, you might wonder what a wise woman would look like. How would she act? How would she manage her time? Well, you are invited to take a seat and watch her - this Proverbs 31 woman is wisdom lived out.

I take comfort in that. Why? I still want to learn to be a diligent, skilled, capable woman like this woman described for us in chapter 31. But, instead of focusing on the particulars of her habits and trying to be just like her, it shifts my focus back to fearing God and searching for wisdom like a hidden treasure.

Ladies, no matter how hard we try to copy this woman and be just like her, we will fail. And we will feel defeated and never want to look at it again. But the search for wisdom is a life-long quest. And the best part is, the Proverbs tell us that if we search for it, we will find it!

James 1:4-5 says, "Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."

Feeling defeated? Ask God for wisdom. Submit to His teaching. Search it out, find wise women to learn from, ponder on His Word, develop your skills.

Now, with that said, let's take a look at our Proverbs 31 woman. I think of all the aspects of wisdom that we find in Proverbs, none is so vividly illustrated in this ultimate wise woman than the trait of diligence and hard work. Consider the following verses:

•She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands. 31:13

•She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls. 31:15

•She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks. 31:17

•She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night. 31:18

•When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 31:21

•She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come. 31:25

•She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness. 31:27

She is a busy lady. She works hard. She doesn't waste her time. She is the definition of being "busy at home!"

So much of what I share on this blog is simply an expression of my own journey, my own learning, what God has challenged me about. I'm going to ramble for a bit - know that this is coming from my own process of learning wisdom. PLEASE don't get the impression that I have this mastered. Yeah, right! :)

Over the past few years since I started my job as a full-time homemaker, God has really challenged me in the area of being busy at home and developing skills to truly be a home-maker. I think many of us look at our job as "keeping the kids out of daycare" rather than being homemakers. There is a big difference.

My job is not to be an activity director, supervision that allows us to legally keep our kids at home. ;) Taking on the mantle of being a home-maker is a huge, HUGE task. Honoring our husbands and being wives that they can trust in as their capable help-meets is time consuming and humbling - for me, that means that I take seriously my ministry of creating a safe haven for him, making sure he has a nicely ironed shirt to wear to work, a delicious and healthy lunch to eat, a nutritious meal and an peaceful home to return home to. It means that I am his biggest fan, the one he can count on to listen to him, pray for him, and notice and be proud of his hard work. If that makes your skin crawl, I understand- like I said, this has been a journey God has had me on! (and I don't always do it well!!)

Managing my home takes time and skills that I am still learning. It takes time and discipline to clean when I would rather watch Bonnie Hunt, and I have found that the "quick" way is not usually the best way! It takes time and discipline to plan our meals, carefully watch our budget, learn about nutrition and "bring our food from afar." I use cloth diapers, bake bread, make yogurt, clip coupons, etc not because it is easy, or even because it is fun (although, sometimes it is!) - I have begun to do these things because I have found them to be the better, although harder, way.

Being a mother takes skill and discipline! It takes discipline to, well, discipline! There are so many times when it would be easier to placate them then to insist that they obey and follow through with consequences. It takes discipline to watch their eating habits and sleep schedule and make sure that they aren't rotting their brains in front of the TV all day instead of having engaging and creative activities to enjoy. Someone has to plan those engaging and creative activities, after all!

And you know what? Our kids are watching. If we want them to learn to be diligent workers, we have to model it. We have to be life-long learners at the hearth of the wise woman, and constantly pray, "O Lord, please teach me your ways! I long for wisdom more than silver, more than great treasure!"

Isn't it interesting that James connects perseverance with maturity and wisdom? There is no overnight fix to gain wisdom. Discipline and skill take large quantities of time invested in order to master them.

Never, NEVER think that being "busy at home" is a small or menial task. Roll up those shirt-sleeves, girls - we have a huge job to do. Let's do it well.